A year ago...

As Dawson's first birthday approaches I can't help but think about where I was a year ago especially after reading Nikki's blog post today. Her due date is very close to mine (only a year apart). Anyway I remember I was due on the 21st (a Saturday) and when I went into my appointment on that Friday Dr. V said if I didn't go into labor over the weekend they would induce me on Tuesday.

I was desperate to go into labor on my own so we tried just about EVERYTHING to bring it on but Dawson wouldn't budge. I was sooo uncomfortable and super swollen. I was scared to death but everything worked out all right in the end and now I have a beautiful baby boy who is almost one. I can't believe it.

Me on the way to the hospital to be induced.

I remember being so worn out from labor and the surgery (Nikki I won't share those details until after you have your little one, k?) and trying to breastfeed Dawson, which is unbelievably hard -- who knew! and he was fighting me with his little tiny hands and I was struggling to get everthing working when I said something to him. I don't even remember probably something like 'hey bud, just calm down" and he stopped fighting me, his little head snapped up and he met my eyes with this pure look of joy on his sweet little face, like there's my mom. And that was it, that was THE MOMENT when I just fell completly in love with my brand new baby.


That was probably the first time he heard my voice after he was born because I was like the 50th person to hold him. At first I was all bummed out because I never got to push and I wasn't the first one to hold him but it didn't matter because I was the one he was looking and listening for.